Pudding-brains (can I say that?) change dessert's name

First it was 'rainbow sheep' instead of that famous nursery rhyme. Then it was swapping the term unemployed to 'unwaged'.

Oh, there have been many more - but today a new example of "political correctness gone mad" (the stock phrase wheeled out for times like these) caught my eye and is currently the sixth most read thing on the BBC website (beating the divorce of Katie Price and Peter Andre, no less!)

The much-loved (not by me, but by many others I'm assured) pudding, Spotted Dick, has been taken off the menu of a council canteen in Wales - and replaced by the less-accurate and more-tricky-say-quickly Spotted Richard. Oh, and the even-less-impressive Sultana Sponge too. Apparently childish comments by 'a small number' of staff members led to the change.

A local councillor is outraged, calling the decision 'ludicrous' and claiming decision-makers would be 'frightened by their own shadow' - a little OTT and harsh, methinks.

It's crazy that we've turned into a country where people are so concerned about frightening others by what is said or written. You're never going to please all the people all of the time, so why - in this case - even contemplating changing the name of a pudding that's been called a certain name for 150 years - just in case some people (whoever they are!) are offended in some way. Dicks refer to 'dough' in this case and have nothing to do with men's genitalia.

Why don't we go through every element of the English language and English culture to come up with new words and new phrases that are meaningless and dull? We don't because all of this is so, so trivial. It's fodder for terrible newspapers like the Daily Mail and dangerous organisations like the BNP.

In fact, why am I spending so much time writing this and thinking about it... (because I find the whole situation hilarious, that's why!) And your comments are welcome please - as long as you don't offend me and that you PC-spellcheck every word!

(Photo credit: Chuck Coker)

The Arctic: a hot topic

Been a bit blowy in the UK this week, hasn't it? Strange for early September. But down under, Australia has been experiencing its hottest-ever winter, with some places getting higher temperatures than in summer! Barmy!

However, if you need a true indication that climate change is happening (and it is... quickly), take a look at the Arctic. It was revealed this week that Arctic temperatures are now higher than any time in the last 2,000 years.

Fancy graphs show that there have been peaks and troughs of warmer and cooler times in the Arctic - but it's never been as bad as now. And what happens there is not merely a local or global problem - there are ramifications for the whole world in terms of rising sea levels and changes to ocean currents.

I've been recently reading about the Arctic in New Internationalist magazine - fascinating articles about the importance of that white splodge at the top of the spinning globe, which is often overlooked. The area contains a quarter of the world's remaining oil and gas reserves, and superpowers and energy giants are squabbling over these precious resources without a thought for local people and wildlife.

I very much hope the plight of the Arctic - and the impact on the rest of the world - is a focus at December's UN climate summit. UN General Secretary Ban Ki-Moon visited the region last week to see the crisis first-hand - I trust his reports will influence others in taking positive action on carbon emissions. The situation has a real feeling of now or never about it.

(Photo credit: P J Hansen)

Don't you just love official reports? I've just been reading a BBC article about one generated by the Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development called, a little cheesily, 'Doing better for the children'.

It compares the well-being of children in different countries - and the results for the UK are a mixed bag.

According to the report, our kids are generally not bullied too much, enjoy a high quality of school life and don't experience a great deal of poverty. But before we pat ourselves on the back too much, the report has discovered that we have more underage drunks (and especially girls) than any other country, more than double the rate than the US, France and Italy. It also highlights the UK's well-publicised high teenage pregnancy rates.

First-off, I'm a little skeptical about reports like these, querying where OECD get their precise percentages from. In this case, are they actually out on the streets counting the teenagers that gather to drink their cider (and do other things besides)? I doubt it. It's probably done by doing a small survey and multiplying up - dodgy stats!

Not that I am denying the drink and pregnancy problem among youngsters in this country, which is a real issue. I actually feel the schools are doing what they can in educating today's teenagers - and it's actually down to parents being better role models for their children, particularly in alcohol consumption, doing a little better in keeping tabs on where their offspring are on a Friday night - and providing safer alternatives.

Of course, all of this is easy for me to say. My eldest starts school for the first time tomorrow (whilst my youngest reaches the grand old age of two later this month) so I have years before this becomes real issues for me and my parenting skills - I hope! I shudder to think of the state of this country by then.

(Photo credit: Bernard Laguerre)

Don't look back in anger, Noel

After 16 years as one of Britain's (if not the world's) best-ever rock bands, the end is nigh for Oasis. Noel Gallagher - the driving force behind the group - told fans yesterday that his feud with brother Liam had reached a point of no return.

I've followed Oasis since pretty much the beginning, so I feel some sadness at the decision - though not entirely surprised, as there's been signs of this in the past.

The band's first album, Definitely Maybe, is undoubtedly their best, mainly because it's raw and unpretentious. The follow-up What's the Story (Morning Glory)? spawned Oasis' greatest hits - anthems for a generation.

I've continued to buy their albums, which have been a little hit and miss generally but with some real gems along the way. I wish I'd got to see Oasis live as I understand them to be one of the best touring bands around. Their Electric Proms performance last year was amazing.

Noel is a very talented individual, as a singer, musician and songwriter, and has carried Liam to be fair. Noel will be back as a solo artist: no doubt about that. As for Liam - expect him to drift out of the limelight and probably become quite elusive.

That's the future, but for now, let's celebrate great music of one of the finest bands to come out of this country in the last two decades... definitely (not maybe).

(Photo credit: Silvio Tanaka)

Football violence kicking off again

The scenes inside and outside Upton Park on Tuesday night were disgusting and disappointing - but I must admit that I wasn't totally surprised.

Unrest, unsociable behaviour and outright violence has been continuially bubbling along 'under the surface' (and away from the radar of the media) between football fans up and down the country since the bad old days of persistant hooliganism of the 70s and 80s. I've seen it first-hand and even got a rogue punch out of the blue by a Manchester City fan in the mid-90s.

Experts agree, saying that the police constantly try to stop violence away from football grounds - at places like railway stations and pubs - and that there are high-risk games, such as the West Ham-Millwall one, which require careful planning (changes to kick-off times and limiting attendance). Sadly that didn't happen this week, making it a disaster waiting to happen.

How should West Ham be punished? Well, I'm not sure they should be - it's not really the fault of the club that a bunch of mindless idiots decided to act as they did. Bans for supporters identified by the many cameras must happen - and will I'm sure.

I very much hope that this violence will ultimately lead to a positive outcome: that each club will act in reviewing how they deal with trouble and their relations with the police. If only football could follow in the footsteps of sports like rugby union where supporters stand side-by-side at matches - finishing the game with a firm handshake rather than a punch to the head.

(Photo credt: Toastbrot81)

Fred & co revive feelgood factor

At 5.50 this evening, joy and pride returned to English sport once again, as our cricketing Lions regained The Ashes from Australia once again.

Proving the heroics of 2005 weren't a one-off, and banishing the horrors of the 5-0 drubbing by the Aussies down under two years ago, Andrew Strauss' men overcame the odds and responded positively to media pressure to pull off a terrific victory.

And just like four years ago, this series has been full of really exciting twists and turns with some remarkable individual performances and sterling team work. With it being his last Test series, all eyes were on the talisman 'Freddie' Flintoff and he didn't let us down on the final day with a brilliant throw to ensure Aussie skipper Ricky Ponting walked.

And while Fred was great this summer, his was a cameo role in truth as the likes of Broad, Swann, Trott and captain Strauss all excelled. This last test match in particular showed signs of a promising few years ahead for England cricket.

Like many others in this country no doubt, I tend to really only watch England's big cricket matches - and they don't come any bigger than The Ashes. And, if 2005 is a benchmark, this sporting achievement will lift the whole of England in the coming days and weeks ahead. In this tricky time of recession, it will do us all - whether cricket-lovers or not - the power of good.

(Photo credit: Luke Redmond)

Speaking the truth

Aged just 31, Malalai Joya is the youngest MP in one of the world's toughest political arenas in the world right now: Afghanistan.

She's a remarkably bold and tenacious woman who is not afraid to speak out against the corruption under President Karzai's government - so much so that she's survived five assassination attempts. She states: "My enemies are trying to eliminate me. I'm not the first but I believe no power is able to hide the truth."

That truth, according to Joya, is that the nation currently has a "warlord, drug-lord government" which rules over a population where 18 million people are living on less than one dollar a day and where there is "injustice, insecurity, joblessness, poverty and corruption."

Tomorrow, Afghanistan holds massively important elections. The eyes of the world have been on the nation so much of late and will stare even more so in the days ahead. Is there a chance of a brighter future? Joya is skeptical - she thinks the elections are a "showcase of the US government" with the next Afghan president being "selected behind the closed doors of the White House".

Reading about her on the train home and on the internet since, I believe for there to be peace in Afghanistan, the country needs more Malalai Joyas: people willing to stand up against the injustices in that place. Of course, it's a hugely dangerous thing to do, which can cost the lives of you, your familyand your friends.

I hope and pray that a wave of change might come about in this beautiful and misrepresented country - and that truth might be the real winner of these elections.

Read 'The big lie of Afghanistan' by Malalai Joya in The Guardian by clicking here.

Photo credit: AfghanKabul